Fighting the Pressure of Hustle Culture
Visual by Layan Dajani
Scrolling through my social media feed all day to put off my piling up online assignments has now become a routine for me. Well, social media has always been part of my daily routine, and it’s not really news that it can create problems. But that debate has already been discussed, and it’s not exactly what has been bothering me.
At first, it seemed that everyone would exploit this quarantine for the relaxation opportunity that I saw it as. While there are people that remain in that camp, it seems that others are attempting to make the absolute most of our time in isolation to better themselves. When I scroll through my for you page on TikTok (that is admittedly customized to my preference), it seems like every other video is a workout routine or a glow up tutorial.
First, I want to say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to better yourself, in fact it’s why I’m writing this right now, to express my feelings and better my mental health. I would never want to make people feel bad about self improvement or anything that they enjoy doing. It is so great that there are creators out there that are providing content for people who enjoy being busy and want to accomplish a lot during quarantine. It is important for us to feel that we have a purpose, and some people have found that following a daily routine helps them avoid going completely stir-crazy. However, it is also important to acknowledge that productivity is not the end-all be-all of a happy and successful life for everyone.
Not everyone is built, or in the right state, at the moment to be extremely productive. While the existence and reminders of workout regimens and other quarantine friendly self betterment activities are extremely helpful to some, those who aren’t keeping busy with a crazy schedule may be feeling shamed by their lack of productivity. It is just as important to be reminded that it is completely, 100% acceptable to just... be. Hustle culture has made us feel that if we aren’t starting new projects, bettering ourselves, or working on our future, then we are losing opportunities with every second and missing out on some form of profit.
Now I live with the ridiculous fear that whenever I come back to school, everyone is going to have the clearest skin and a body that ticks the boxes of all those impossible beauty standards. Meanwhile, I wasted my time eating popcorn in my room. But really, I shouldn’t even feel that way because life isn’t a competition and every body is beautiful in their own way. Still, my brain has never been able to stop comparing myself with others, and this situation bleeds past surface values. Every time I sit down to watch a YouTube video or spend an hour dancing (more like flailing) around my room, a little voice in the back of my brain yells at me about all of the time I’m wasting and how I could be using this time to prepare for my future. As a high school sophomore my future seems so far away, yet looming so near, and that is really scary. All I know is that I want to go to college —because that’s always been the plan— why, where, or how I’m even supposed to do that. It’s like I am playing the game with only the “objective” part of the instructions and everyone else is hiding the rule book.
I am half-Vietnamese, and while I definitely don’t speak for all Asian Americans, I have lived with my Asian mother for all my life; so, in my experience productivity and preparing for my future has always been the top priority. Heck, I’ve been doing workbooks three years ahead of my grade since I could talk, started SAT prep in middle school, and joined every club humanly possible. The fear that there will always be someone out there working harder than me is constant. I used to even have a quote about it on my mirror that I would see everyday (which I have now erased in favor of some more positive ones). Burnout is a good friend of mine, but our toxic relationship needs to end, and I am trying to find a way to do that.
My upbringing and the current hustle culture has made it really hard to accept my own advice. I found that when I am horribly belting songs in my room, watching movies, and dancing like no one’s watching (because no one actually is in quarantine), that I actually feel happy, in a way that I haven’t allowed myself to feel in a long time. These silly things bring me joy so I have decided that I will continue to do them.
Maybe everyone already knew all of this, and the whole message was self-explanatory, but I really needed to take the time to understand myself and I hope this helps someone out too. So, the TL;DR version of my brain dump is really just: if being productive makes you happy, then props to you and continue to do whatever you’re doing. If it doesn’t, then do something that does make you feel good. Ignore the pressure to do things that don’t “spark joy”, as Marie Kondo would say. As long as you aren’t harming anyone, then find happiness in whatever you want. That’s really what we are all searching for anyway, a way to be happy in all of this uncertainty.